life, mindfulness, poems, writing

Starlight

“My life, you electrify my life”

-Starlight
I think it was a matter of wrong timing. All of the signs were present, i just didn’t notice them. I regret not noticing them because now it’s too late. I don’t have you. I can’t have you. It is forbidden. Some days all I think about is you and the song Starlight starts playing in my head, “I just wanted to hold you in my arms…” The truth is i wasn’t ready–back then–to confess my love for you. And now that I have it’s too late. I think it was a matter of wrong timing. I was too young when perhaps it was a good time. All I know is I fell in love “a trav├ęs del tiempo” I fell in love with the passing of time and in retrospect remembered you. Two years went by of me repressing memories of you and when they finally came up in a psychosis it was definitely the wrong time and place for a proclamation of love but nevertheless I proceeded. I don’t regret it. Only that I wish I had said it earlier. Right now I want us to conspire to re-ignite, like the song goes. But life is not a song. And you are not mine. 

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blogs, mindfulness, poems, self-esteem

Tired

I’m listening to David Bowie and I think, “why not write?” 

But I’m tired.

Tired of life.

Tired of this nothingness.

Tired of waking up every morning.

Tired of trying to figure it all out.

So today, I don’t want to write.

When will I want to write?

I don’t know.

I just know that I’m tired and that music alleviates my soul and I wish I could be a hero one day like the song goes and write something worthwhile.